Me too!
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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