dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
