Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize