end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
