You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
