We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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