Are we in a gay sports bar?
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
