Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Randomize
