It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Randomize
