I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
