Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize
