Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Randomize
