My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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