you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
