please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
