a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
