i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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