I'm so fucking centered right now
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
