I only kidnapped one of them. chill
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
