no you cant smoke seaweed
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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