Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Randomize
