Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i barfeds in our rink
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
