i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
