well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize
