doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
