i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Randomize
