pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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