love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
