drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize