shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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