My first STD was from a foam party
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Randomize
