I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
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