I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
