I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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