Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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