these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize