next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Randomize
