Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
