Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
