fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Who put my cat in the fridge?
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
