I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
