Well apparently he's into motor boating.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
As shirtless as possible
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize