Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Randomize
