whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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