dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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