Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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