U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Randomize
