Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Randomize
