So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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