marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Randomize
